Wisdom Teeth: An Epilogue

Note: In this thrilling follow-up to yesterday’s post, the writer regrets his naivety and is now eating all the yogurt he can stomach.


I wanted to take this opportunity to publicly apologize. While I was out for the entirety of the surgery, the trauma of yanking 4 teeth from anyone’s mouth (including my extra toothy one) is nothing to joke about. I lost a ton of blood, resulting in a very weak, woozy, and shivering nomnomnomics that was without food or drink for 18 hours. I don’t think I’ve ever felt worse, honestly.

So c-c-cold...so very very cold.

As for the poetry, I was quite lucid after the surgery. The ability to form coherent sentences and suppress a few abstract thoughts are not the means to becoming a quality poet (I mean, Samuel Coleridge would agree). I did have a chance to knock out a few stanza of haiku though.

Bye-bye wisdom teeth
Gauze in every crevice
Ew…bloody sockets

Careful directions
No spitting and don’t use straws
Like jail, but for mouths

Man that was depressing. It’s going to be a long weekend.

Hamsterdam: brought to you by regret.

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